A sum up to wrap everything. I've gone back and forth on whether I should type something more in-depth, probably a more detailed account about the various happenings that have been rummaging through my mind. I'd figured if I'm still haunted by it endlessly, I might as well go ahead with it and post here.

I doubt I would be able to spill the whole of my introspection here in a post, neither would I be bothered to anyway. It'll just be whatever I can think of. Apologies here.

Taking a breather, guess that's what all I need from this year's never ending amount of homework, stress, barriers I have got to break. Year 2010 was one of the best I have indeed spent in my entire 15 years of life. On the contrary, the exceedingly unfavourable one too.

Best being that the I've obviously made more sincere, loving and caring mates around me whom I can trust, depend on. At the same time, building up the various principles I hold strongly in me.

Worst - I can't handle the pressure, me being temperamental. Lost two of my most bosom friends in life, and still in the midst of trying to salvage the situations I've got myself into. Its a dread encountering all these, but that's just part and parcel of life huh.

So a few weeks back, it was one of my toughest rides, the most extreme one I had to take. Coping with my end-of-year examinations were already a roller coaster, but with add-ons such as emotional ones? I could barely hang on to anything. I had never dealt with anything so heart-wrenching before.

To be honest, it was like a knife stabbed into my chest. An excruciating pain I have to endure no matter how deep the despondency sank. And unfortunately, it wasn't a physical one, whereby one could just faint if he/she couldn't take it. How I wish it occurred the same for emotional walls.

And how glad am I that the ultimate tide is finally over. Just that the picture of us never fail to fill up my mind 24/7. I have tried my utmost best to save our friendship, but all seems to be of no avail. It was one of my colossal mistakes in life, and I really regret making it. One wrong step was all I had to took and it was a road of no return. Correction, perhaps a chance in turning things around.

Time. Time will reveal everything, and definitely, heal my wounds, no matter how immeasurable it is. It's just that everything seems to pass like the snail period. A second feels like an hour, so on and so forth with that days plus months. For now, the only thing I look forward to isn't my vacation trips, my shopping paradises, instead just for us to have a reconcilation.

It seems to be an impossible task, I agree it is. For my countless times of trials have proved me so. However, that doesn't imply anything. By all means that I even have to cling on to every hope left. Just like how the night skies taught me, wish upon a wishing star. Or for that matter, the more up to date fashion - making a wish if you manage to catch 11:11. It's idiotic, an act of stupidity. But I wonder if that's how it is going to make me feel better, I will, with no hesitation. For I willingly acknowledge it guides me out of my darkest moments.

Touch my heart, and I'd say I did treasure you. It just wasn't enough. Believe it or not, I will be turning things right again, back to the proper track where a car belongs.

The haunting has erected in me for the past 1month, and I am so going to get it out of my head. Not now, not yet. Once again, I need time.